First Date Etiquette

Recently, a friend of mine met a guy at a party. He said, in that sickeningly coy manner, "What would you say if I hypothetically asked you out for a drink?"

"Hypothetically I would say yes," he replied. (I know, I know... Try and keep your dinner down for now. It gets better)

So they talked and arranged to meet that Wednesday. Wednesday came and he hadn't heard anything, so he texted him and said "Hey.. So tonight, when and where?"

And nothing.

Then he tortured himself over and over by asking whether he should phone him or not... Would he look like a stalker? Wouldn't he? Would this guy go out on a date?

The simple answer is call him.

If he's being a wanker for not letting you know either way, then call. If he doesn't pick up, fine; make other plans. If he picks up and says no, that's even better; at least you know you can make other plans. I really resent the fact that we've all been reduced to being concerned about how keen we are. The fact is no-one is that desperate- that's the truth. I think anyone with the tiniest ounce of respect for you will let you get on with your life.

The truth is men like that are cowards.

So next time you find yourself in that dilemma, do not focus on the negatives; remember that if they're wasting your time now, imagine what it would be like 3 months down the line. And if they don't want to see you, they're missing out on being with a really rewarding person.

Move over, Oprah; I'm after your job!

Suddenly in demand...

And then comes the time of year in every single person's life; being in demand. However, being in demand is not the walk in the park, pic 'n' mix, mix 'n' match heaven you'd envision in to be. No- being in demand is absolutely hellish.

For one thing, your social calendar becomes even more clustered. So as well as getting round to see all those friends in your social circles, you now have to squeeze in Mr. 'I could be the man of your dreams, or this could just be another waste of time'. But, being the way I am, I'm always saying, "Errr... I'm busy Saturday night. I have a window between 4.30pm and 4.37pm. Perhaps we could fit an awkward silence in then? That'd be great, thanks".

Secondly, you can't tell anyone of the dates that you're going on that you have a date arranged with someone else. Don't get me wrong- I'm not slutting myself around town, but if you decide to go on a first date with a guy, there's no point in telling one of the other guys that you're also going on a first date with someone else that week because the likelihood is that neither of them will work out.

I remember my old psychology teacher used to say "The guy who asks a lot of people out on dates gets a lot of rejections... But he also gets a lot of dates." It's a numbers game; the more people you meet, the more likely you are to find someone you like.

I have to admit, it's a lot of fun as well

xx